One of the main ingredients to sensuality – and to life in general – is consent. But how often do you feel that someone overstepped their boundaries and encroached upon your space? That could simply concern your need to keep a physical distance from people (think crowded bus) or it could be someone touching you without your consent, or worse. Consent is a concept that sounds really simple, but it can be a bit of a challenge. For one thing, you need to be very much aware where your personal boundaries lie, if they are general or specific to this other person, if you know how to communicate these limits (do you know the words?), if you feel ready to communicate (are you shy?), etc. It turns out that these things take experience, and part of being consciously sensual is to be aware of those pitfalls and acting accordingly. “This sounds very brainy and not sensual to me!” I hear you say It may sound that way, but the matter of the fact is that you won’t have to stop and think about this anymore in the middle of something. Once you have properly worked out for yourself what you are ready to accept, from whom, how to express your feelings and desires at any time, you won’t be steamrolled into things you do not want because you will come across as more decisive and self-assured. Beware: those strategies only hold up in non-violent situations, of course. Doing this ahead of time is worth considering. That does not mean you’ll have to be inflexible: when the mood strikes you’d be surprised how much your personal boundaries might stretch. Just keep in mind your original reasoning when you decide to change it up… make up your mind and say it out loud
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About me
These are my own thoughts on aspects of my work I feel strongly about. Archives
September 2021
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