Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be tied up and tickled until your body just gives in? Or maybe you are thinking more along the lines of being flogged or [fill in your particular idea]. On the other hand, perhaps your fantasy involves being handled with care: being washed with soft sponges by three boys at once and then sensually massaged with sweet-smelling oils? Either way, I’m sure we all conjure up all kinds of scenes in our minds on occasion. Some – I would even presume many – of us do so not only in the privacy of our boudoirs when we are alone, but also when we are currently having a good time with another guy. Some of you may now feel a little cringy, even feel guilty for having done so while having sex with a guy and thinking about a completely different one… hold it right there, Diego! There is nothing wrong with fantasizing at any moment. Thinking about something hot and steamy during sex could simply be a way to make things even more enjoyable! Don’t forget: it is extremely difficult to keep your mind on one task – just ask anyone who tried silent meditation for the first time and finding their mind drifting off in unexpected directions. Sex is no different in that respect: you may be fully engaged with your partner, but your mind is still akin to a roomful of wool and two dozen kittens! Wouldn’t you agree that one focused supporting fantasy is better for your sex life than a distracted mind trying to sort to untangle dozens of thoughts? (insert kitten analogy here). I’d say: as long as you remain with your man of the moment and the fantasy does not take away from your engagement with him, all is well! Next time you find your mind drifting into a particular fantasy, consider this: wouldn’t it be fun to ask your man to try that one out? Some fantasies are worth living out. Some are just fantasies!
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These are my own thoughts on aspects of my work I feel strongly about. Archives
September 2021
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